'what-if's

semalam, aku mimpi yg sgt real n mnakutkan smpai walaupun aku da terbangun2 tp aku masih nk bergolek2 ats katil..x nk bngun..tkut ngan realiti..kalau mimpi tu btol. aku mimpi aku bru lps PMR..nk msuk form 4. pastu dpt la borang nk pindah or nak stay. so aku letak la nk stay (dlm mimpi ni, walopon sbenarnye dlm realiti aku pindah tym form 4) n so memori aku psl kwn2 aku kat lgkwi pon sume ilang..takut btol! tp at the same time, aku still sayang kwn2 aku kat pontian gak.. so dlm mimpi tu, time tgh wat 1 projek ni, tgh2 buat tu, aku tetibe teringat kat mcm mne agaknye kalo aku pindah..jumpe kwn2 baru.. smpai aku nangis..kwn2 aku kat pontian sume pelik.. so sblom aku terjage btol2 aku ckp aku nk stay 1 sem kat pontian, n pstu, somehow aku akan pindah lgkwi. (by hook or by crook, determined btol) so lps aku wat janji tu dlm mimpi tu, baru aku bole bngun..haha.. tu yg tdo smpai lbeh 14 jam tu..seram btol

tp actually bnde ni mmg aku slalu fikir gakk dlm wktu berjage aku.. so somehow my subconscious mind cri solution n clarify my feeling about this. mcm mne 1 action/ decision yg kite buat bole affect our whole life; change our course of life..

kdg2 ble aku tgk pictures kwn2, geng aku kat pontian, aku rse cm rugi, 'khilangan', lost something important, not being able to spend the 2 years of my life together with them,
being there with them, being through whatever they've been through.. it makes me really sad.

but then again, if i stayed and not go to langkawi, i wouldn't have met my other friends,
know them, and been through what i've been through.. and to even think of losing that, is sad enough.. if someday, somehow, my memories are to be forgotten, i'd rather die than living with such emptiness.

how to say this? i really love my friends back in pontian, but i also love my friends back in langkawi. all of them taught me something.. and i will never ever trade them with something other than themselves.

if i were ever given a chance to go back in time and correct something, the only thing i would do is make myself cherish the time i've been through more!

huu..mcm mne nk kate lg ekk? snang cte, kpd geng2 aku, aku sayang korang! [^.^]